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I once told a joke about a straight person.

They came after me in droves.

Each one singing the same:

Don’t fight fire with fire.

*

What they mean is: Don’t fight fire with anything.

Do not fight fire with water.

Do not fight fire with foam.

Do not evacuate the people.

Do not sound the alarms.

Do not crawl coughing and choking and spluttering to safety.

Do not barricade the door with damp towels.

Do not wave a white flag out of the window.

Do not take the plunge from several storeys up.

Do not shed a tear for your lover trapped behind a wall of flame.

Do not curse the combination of fuel, heat, and oxygen.

Do not ask why the fire fighters are not coming.

*

When they say: Don’t fight fire with fire.

What they mean is: Stand and burn.

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- Stand and Burn by Claudia Boleyn.   (via collectivecadaver)

(via totally-stab-caesar)

Dear science,
Please invent accessible teleportation devices. It is of the utmost importance. (It is for cuddles)
Sincerely,
Some upset people who can’t cuddle with other upset people tonight

megan says stuff sometimes

moonflowerlights:

ninthtravelingman:

nealdk:

whatarefishfingers:

ruffnutthorstonthebesttwin:

theprettiestman:

Notice how Shan Yu doesn’t even question it or make a comment about “BUT YOU’RE A GIRL” he just instantly goes into a “I’LL TEACH YOU TO KILL MY MEN AND STEAL MY VICTORY” rage and I think about this a lot sometimes

((Well that might have to do with the fact that he’s a Hun.  Women among the Huns had higher status than their Chinese counterparts and even some of their own men. Women were free to hunt and fight along side of the men, could choose their own husbands and divorce him if she choose to. There were even records of clans being led by women leaders. So for Shan Yu Mulan is just another soldier))

thank you, history side of tumblr.

He also might not have been able to see very well, due to whatever horrible disease has taken hold in his eyeballs.

Pretty serious Wilson’s Disease judging by the copper buildup in in irises, and apparent melanocytosis localized to his sclera.

Thank you medical side of tumblr

(Source: subtubitles, via lesbianfosur)